31 weeks...

it occurred to me for the first time today that my being pregnant brings me one step closer to death. every day brings us one step closer to expiration, but key life stages really make you contemplate the next life stage and reflect on the previous one. i was watching the Edith Piaf film at the cinema tonight after having spent the day with Carolyn and her new crew and preparing the guest room for my mom. watching the film made me think about how very little anything but you're children, parents and siblings really mean. of course, there are a very select few people that might fall into the category of immediate family. i just want to make sure when i diei can feel like i didn't fuck up too many times as a parent. the last few days have been tough emotionally/hormonally. I've been able to keep it all in perspective, but the tears are certainly free flowing! must be hard for men to empathise. it's bizarre for me even when I'm in the moment, because i don't really feel sad from a logical or intellectual standpoint, but the hormones really do take over and i just cry. i'll be glad for that part to be over and a few tears is certainly worth the joy of the baby.

i'm trying to eat helthy, but it's hard when you don't cook. i'm not eating poorly at all, but i'd lik eto have more fresh organic vegetables in my diet. i've added fruit which was a big change for me. cutting out alcohol was another big change, but that was easy.

ivillage says...

WHAT'S HAPPENING WITH YOU
At this point you may be quite eager for your pregnancy to end and your baby to be born. Aches and pains, along with feelings of anxiety, may be on the rise. Your body might be weighing you down, and weird stuff (like false contractions and vaginal secretions) is starting to pop up. The final weeks may begin to drag, but you're very near the finish line now.
Read more about Body Changes.

WHAT'S HAPPENING WITH YOUR BABY
The digestive track is nearly mature, but the last few weeks in utero are critical for the lungs. In fact, one of the biggest problems experienced by premature babies is underdeveloped lungs. But if your little one decides to emerge before your due date, there is much that can be done in the hospital to get them -- and the rest of that little body -- ready to go home.
Read more about The Premature Baby.